by Daniel Nkado and Mosope Sotade
Weddings are a huge thing in Nigeria and it doesn't matter which tribe is involved.
Whether from the North, South, East or West, Nigerians don't take weddings lightly. The reason it could take over a year to plan a single Nigerian wedding.
If you've ever attended any Nigerian wedding, then you'd know how drama-filled it gets.
Here are 8 things about Nigerian weddings that can be very annoying:
1. Buying aso-ebi materials
"Aso-ebi" is a Yoruba word that literally translates to "Family Clothing".
Usually, when someone is planning a wedding in Nigeria, every member of their family is involved. The bride will choose a piece of fabric and, in some cases, jewelry too, which the entire family must have to pay for and wear on the wedding day.
For some big weddings, there might be up to two or three aso-ebi materials and each family member, no matter how poor you are, must ensure they buy the fabric.
The annoying thing about aso-ebi is that the materials can be overwhelmingly expensive.
2. Guests are more interested in the food
In Nigerian weddings, the most important aspect is, surprisingly, the food. This is the reason many of the guests never join the wedding service and will only show up at the reception -- because that's where all the eating and drinking happen.
Things can even escalate easily and you see people fighting for food.
3. Annoying aunties
Aunties occupy an important niche in Nigerian families. Some of them have acquired master's degrees in tormenting the younger members of the family. You can read this post about Nigerian aunties to get a feel of what we are talking about.
We usually avoid situations that will bring us in close proximity to our aunties, but weddings are a peculiar case and there's no hiding from an aunty here. Not when they are usually the major coordinators of the wedding event.
Usually, they are the ones running the show, so it'll only be in your best interest to behave well and obey whatever they say.
Some of the annoying things Nigerian aunties do are:
a. Asking about marriage plans
b. Talking about your performance in school or at work in public
c. Using your personal stuff without seeking your permission
d. Publicly sharing embarrassing things you did in childhood
4. Favoritism during refreshment
This is probably why aso-ebi is so important. It is the one thing that confirms to the food and drinks and souvenir sharers that you are related to the family and hence should be served well.
Woe betide you if you attend a Nigerian wedding without knowing anybody. You will likely not eat or have anything to drink, let alone going home with a souvenir.
5. The wedding thieves
Some people do not really come to the wedding to celebrate with the bride and groom. They are there only to restock their refrigerators at home.
Women are more guilty of this. You see those women coming to the wedding reception with unusually big handbags? They are the ones to suspect.
6. The Amebos
These are the "bad belle" people whose only reason for coming to the wedding is to talk about the groom and criticize the outfits and food.
They are usually past friends of the bride or groom mired in jealousy.
7. Bridesmaids trying to outshine the bride
At Nigerian weddings, nobody wants to carry last.
A lot of the unmarried people at the wedding are hoping to get hitched too. Even the bridesmaids. Usually, the bridesmaids are supposed to look good, but you can always tell the ones with a mission to steal the bride's shine.
They just want to be noticed at all times. This can be fun sometimes, but not when they overdo it.
8. Drunk uncles
Some men cannot handle free drinks. Drink-loving uncles at weddings can get easily overwhelmed by all the free drinks.
They'd end up drinking too much and effectively ruins the party with their distasteful drunk behaviour.
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Daniel Nkado and Mosope Sotade contributed to this article.
